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    索取也是一种爱

           昨天是个特殊的日子,去上课时没带手机,家里打了无数次的电话,在以前母亲电话的第一句永远都是你还好吗?然后就是我晒了一些香肠或者是一些腊鱼一类的给你捎来好吗?我从来都是满口拒绝,心里的反应也永远都是烦,总觉得这些东西咸渍渍的,再说我也没有习惯弄来吃,新鲜蔬菜与水果是我的胃唯一的选择方向,电话那头的声音也总是在我拒绝中有一丝淡淡的。
    一直以来我很为自己的独立而感自豪,每月的收入也总是按时的汇给父母,从小到大我基本上都没有让父母操过心,成年后更是从来都不曾对父母亲索取过什么,这一切都让我这个并无良好的社会关系的平民人家之女而沾沾自喜。每每母亲来电跟我唠叨些事物或是说有好吃的要我回家去拿时,我也只是说我给你们汇钱好了,并没感觉她有多失落。
    可是现在我的心里空落落的,才感同身受了。曾经看到过一个故事,说一个收入不菲的女子,总是打电话跟家人要上个三五百的钱用来周转,或是跟母亲半撒娇的让母亲给她做好吃的东西,或是让母亲帮她去洗洗衣服什么的,乍看到此,我为此女子的举措嗤之以鼻,总为一些小事而去给家人添麻烦,真是不可理喻。但看到最后,我却泪流满面,父母亲把儿女抚养长大后,就远走高飞了,留下他们在家面面相觑,没有人再需要他们的呵护与照顾,让他们感觉到种种失落。那时候我才明白,爱一个人,不仅仅是付出,还需要被对方需要着,因为爱,所以才死劲地索取,爱一个人,就要给她爱你的机会,要让她明白你对她的倦恋与依赖。
            同样,在爱情中也是这个道理!我只是想让你记住这一天,这样的索取不过分吧?

    I TRY TO REMEMBER

    1. Everybody doesn’t have to love me
        Not everyone has to love me or even like me.I don’t necessarily like everybody I know,so why should everybody else like me? I enjoy  being liked and being loved,but if somebody doesn’t like me,1 will still be okay and still feel like I am an okay person.I cannot make some-body like me anymore than someone can get me to like them.I don。t need approval all the time.If someone does not approve of me.1 will still be okay.

    2.It is okay to make mistakes.
        Making mistakes is something we all do,and I am still a fine and worthwhile person when I make them.There is no reason for me to get upset when I make a mistake.I am trying,and if I make a mistake,I am going to continue trying.I can handle making a mistake.it is okay for others to make a mistake.too.I will accept my mistakes and also the mistakes that others make

    3.Other people are okay and I am okay.
       People who do things that I don’t like are not necessarily bad people.They should not necessarily be punished just be—cause I don’t like what they do or did.There is no reason why other people should be the way I want them to be,and there is no reason why I should be the way somebody else wants me to be.People will be whatever they want to be,and 1 will be whatever I want to be.I cannot control other people or change them.They are who they are; we all deserve basic respect.

    4.I don’t have to control things.
        I will survive if things are different than what 1 want them to be.I can accept things the way they are,accept people the way they are,and accept myself the way I am.There is no reason to get upset if I can’t change things to fit my idea of how they ought to be.There is no reason why I should have to like everything.
    Even if I don’t like it,I can live with it.


    5.I am responsible for my day.
        I am responsible for how I feel and what I do.Nobody can make me feel anything.If I have a rotten day。I am the one who allowed it to be that way.If I have a great day,l am the one who desexes credit for being positive.It is not the responsibility of other people to change so that I can feel better.I am the one who is in charge of my life.

    6.I can handle it when things go wrong.
        I don’t need to watch out for things to go wrong.They usually go just fine,and when they don’t.I can handle it.I don’t have to waste energy worrying.The sky won’t fall;things will beokay.

    7.It is important to try.
        I can.Even though I may be faced with  difficult tasks,it is better to try than to avoid  them.Avoiding a task does not give me any  opportunities for success or joy,but trying  does.Things worth having are worth the effort.I might not be able to do everything.But I can do something.

    8.I am capable.
        I don’t need someone else to take care of my problems.1 am capable.I can take dare of myself.I can make decisions for myself.I can think for myself.I don’t have to depend on somebody else to take care of me.

    9.I can change.
        I don’t have to be a certain way because of what has happened in the past.Every day is a new day.It's silly to think I can’t help being the way I am.Of course I can.1 can change.

    10.I can be flexible.
        There is more than one way to do something.More than one person has had good ideas that will work.There is no one and only”best”way.Everybody has ideas that are worthwhile.Some may make more sense to me than others。but everyone’s ideas are worthwhile,and everyone has something worthwhile to contribute.

    《新结婚时代》?匪夷所思!

        前几天在网上看了这部据说是继《激情》以后国内最好的片子,最近下午武汉四台又在热播,偶尔看到重复的剧情,还是那么多悲愤想发表!
        此剧确实很现实 ,很吸引人,也揭示了很深刻的社会问题,但是电视也有很多让人匪夷所思的情节!
    1,何建国是清华硕士,年薪12万,前面建国对小西说他钱都给他爹了,结果他爹还管建国要钱,不知道他要那么多钱干嘛?怎么花?不解.
    2,何建国和他哥都考上清华?那既然只能供一个干吗还俩都考?还不如让一个早点去工作呢?再说现在都有贫困助学贷款,好多农村学生都是贷款的,我们单位有好几个博士上学都没用过家里一分钱呢!没家里供是完全可以上大学的!
    3,何建国又不学医又不进高校怎么会非得小西她家给找工作?现在硕士大多都是导师推荐,清华这种名校出来自己找工作还是可以的. 以下还有很多情节让人置疑他是否受过良好的教育!
    4,何建国用背信弃义的方式上了大学,可以看出他是个自私的人,如果我老公象他那样我肯定会感到可怕,因为以后他很可能在关键是时候背叛我,这种连亲兄弟都不放过的人你知道他能干出什么?小西听了居然不生气.
    5,何建国的某些言行更让人乍舌:因为韩国人有钱,所以韩国的泡菜就是健康食品;要把小航从意大利带回送给小西的lv女式手袋送给一个男人,而且居然那么震惊一个lv的价格;趁和小西做完爱,立马提出给家里办事!我都想吐了!他有没有受过高等教育?简直亵渎爱情!
    6,再说何建国一清华硕士,主管,后来到总监,混到30几一点人脉没有?他清华同学都下乡了?一有事就找小西,居然还老要求小西她妈向病人开口!足以见得他做人有多差!瞧他说小夏偷钱那态度,真想揍他。他把小夏气走了,还拿小西出气。平常也总是趁着他爸他哥在的时候故意冲小西发火,整个一没用的吃软饭的男人!真不如他哥明白事理。最不能忍受,他居然打女人!
    7,为了面子害得小西习惯性流产,自己的女人为了给他家同村人办事,流产第二天满大街跑,痛到快虚脱,他居然不心疼,还说她太娇贵!将自己女人的衣服随便送人(还企图撒谎蒙混过去!),什么表姑父迁坟,什么让小西给不认识的人哭丧!自己女人发高烧快死掉了也不知道!还害得小西连母亲最后一面也没见着!他是不是那么爱小西,我不解。
    8,农村人是直爽了点,但我觉得除了神经病,不知羞耻的少,像建国他爸什么事都找儿媳妇家的人办事的少,建国他爹简直毁了农村人憨厚的形象!像他那一辈的人虽然许多都是大字不识几个,但也不会这么不明事理,我一看到他出现就跟小西一样头疼,感觉他养了建国好像是以前在街头看到的表演的小孩一样,我把你培养了,你就得给我还回来。他不像是一个父亲,或者说这样的一个形象不太真实。
    9,为什么何家村的男人找个北京媳妇就脸上有光?一次次要求小西回去给他们“长脸”!北京女孩还多长个脑袋不成?我有个女友的bf也是农村的,但是人家公婆还嫌弃她这个城里媳妇呢!
    10,如今都多少农村人有车有房有存款了?有部分城里人自我感觉太良好点了,觉得自己观念新就笑人土?觉得自己穿的好就笑人旧?觉得自己身边的大厦就比人家的乡村别墅好?本剧的编剧丑化农村形象!

    鸟笼?

        躺在床上到十点,半梦半醒间,质量并不好,我不是应该疯狂享受开学前的懒觉吗?不知道是什么原因,总也不能安心的睡觉,心里有很多事情,理也理不清.我到底是个什么样的人.有时候连我自己的搞不懂,自己心里最想要的是什么,最想得到的又是什么.经验告诉我,我越是在乎,越是想要的,往往和我失之交臂。老天是公平的,或者是我真的不够善良?
        记得有这样一个故事,有一天,一个人送了他一个朋友一只鸟笼,他的朋友说我不喜欢养鸟,你送我鸟笼干吗?他说:"只要你把笼挂在你家里,短则不出3天,长则不出半月,你肯定会养的."那人不信.真的没出几天,上他家里来的人,差不多都问关于鸟笼之类的话,"你的鸟死了吗?要不要我送你只?是不是你不会养啊、、、、、等等之类的话。有一天那人终于受不了,就买了只鸟养起来了,现在社会上有多少的人,也都养养鸟人那样以人养鸟的。很多的事或许是某些人意识范围内不想去做的,那是什么影响着他呢?